He wasn't my first horse but he was my 26 year companion

It has been over 3 weeks since I lost him.  I am still crying my eyes out.  It is so hard going outside and not having him greet me with his nickers after galloping to his feeding area as fast as he could when he would spot me coming out the door.    Life without a horse is very different than living with them.  There is something missing.  The something is huge.

Bucko and I began living together  in June 1981.  It was Memorial Day weekend when I first met my big shiny copper colored boy.  In the news at the time was the death of Bob Marley and his 50 mile long funeral procession to the community of Nine Miles Jamaica, where he was born.  It was my birthday weekend when I first laid eyes on him.  I had heard about Bucko a week or so earlier from a friend who saw him at an auction, where he was not sold.  I was living in Minneapolis at the time and packing for the move back north when the phone rang...."Hi it's me", said my friend Diane.  "I saw the perfect horse for you at an auction today and when you come we have to go see him.  If you don't buy him I will but I will let you have a chance at him first and if you buy him and ever decide to sell him you have to give me first crack at him".   Dianne already had an awesoem horse named Duke so she didn't need a Bucko as much as I did.   I was in the process of moving to a farm that was owned by Dianne's mother who was also a friend of mine.  Char had succumbed to cancer a year previous.  

I was immediately excited!  If Diane said she saw the perfect horse, I believed  her.   It had to be true.  At the time I didn't know which was more exciting!  The prospect of moving back home or knowing I was going to go see some horseflesh that was spectacular and could end up mine!

The week of the move north was met with much anticipation.   The packing and the planning and the  organizing the caravan of trucks that would move my things home to northern Minnesota combined with meeting the wonder horse had me jumping out of my skin with excitement!  I remember it like it was yesterday...

Upon my friday night arrival to my new home, as the unpacking of trucks and boxes was taking place, what I most wanted to hear about was the horse I would see in the morning.... 

More soon 

Comments

[Elna Daigle]

I will always remember the picture of you and Bucko. I'm sorry he is gone. It is tough to lose a good friend. He had a good life with you. Love Ma

[PamF]

I know it must still be hard for you but I look forward to reading the story of how you and Bucko met and became pals. Being a city girl who always wanted a horse as a kid, you are living every little girl's dream....but along with the dream comes the reality of outliving our pets.

When you continue your story, I will be ready to read it.

Peace.
PamF

[Stephanie]

Thanks Mom & Pam. I will be ready to add more soon. I still cannot get used to life without him.

[Myrna]

Stephanie, I am so sorry to hear about the loss of your dear friend, Bucko. I've been reading your stories about him for so long now, that I feel like he is part of my extended family, even though we never met. Losing a family member from the animal kingdom is like losing your own child, and it takes a long time to get used to the space they leave behind. You were blessed to have Bucko in your life, and he was blessed to have you in his.

Myrna from Vancouver

[Stephanie]

Hi Myrna! It is so great to see you! yes, it is still very hard. I thought I was doing better until yesterday when I went to the grocery store. I decided to build a pot of soup this weekend so I reached for the carrots. I really don't like carrots but soup needs carrots. I will never use all of the carrots in the bag and now I have nobody to give them to. I stood there and couldn't help but get all teary eyed because I used to buy extra carrots just for Bucko. This morning I was able to go out and enjoy a sunrise with the dogs and take pictures, but it has been hard to go out there and not see my boy. God I miss him so bad!

I hope to start adding to the story soon, but it is still too hard.

[Myrna]

Stephanie, here I am back again in 2008, reading about Bucko again and shedding more tears. I see you haven't continued your story, and I completely understand why. It is just too painful.

I'm going to be in Negril in a couple of weeks and hoping to go to the Donkey Races in LB. Any chance you will be there? I'd love to meet you.

Myrna in Vancouver

[Stephanie]

Hi Myrna, so GREAT to see you!

I will not be going to Jamaica in time for the donkey races this year. Sad too because it is the TENTH annual this year! Can you believe!

I will be continuing with my Bucko stories but it is still too soon. I have been collecting some photos and tried to start writing but it still kills me he is gone.

Have a wonderful trip and if you make it to the Donkey races take a picture for me or something!

Safe travels!

Stephanie

[Myrna]

Stephanie, I will definitely take lots of pictures for you at Uncle Sam's. Wish you could make it.

I understand how you feel about Bucko. I went through the same thing with my beloved Chica, my kitty, a year ago November. Lost her to cancer and it took a piece of my heart. I still get a lump in my throat, even just typing about it.

People were asking about you lately on negril.com. Don't know if you still check the board. Someone posted a picture of you at Sam's. I miss the old days.

Hope to meet you one day. Take care. And P.S., I am going to order a bracelet from you soon, probably when I get back from Negril. I should have done it sooner so I'd have one to wear while I'm there, but waited too long.

Myrna

[Stephanie]

Good morning Myrna!

I am so sorry about your sadness still over Chica. I also lost my Ruby last year and little old Areo, so yeah, it hurts like a knife doesn't it! sigh...

I don't get over to negril.come hardly at all anymore or any other Jamaican forums besides Jamaicans.com. I have taken to hovering art and bead sites these days!

Have a wonderful trip and I would LOVE to see your photos! Did you know Sam is planning TWO donkey race weekends this year? One will be a week from this coming Sunday on the 27th and another one on the traditional weekend (1st weekend if feb) which this year is on the 3rd, but I bet you already knew that!

I am here anytime you would love a bracelet!

Have a wonderful trip, and safe travels!

Stephanie

[Schultz]

(((Steph))). I know it's been a while now that you've lost Bucko but I wanted you to know that I still think about him too. I've never laid eyes on him but I know how special our animal friends are and how attached we get. Boy, it's hard to get used to the fact that they are gone. I hope your heart is mending. Love ya, Schultz

[Stephanie]

Thanks Schultz! Yes it is still hard and I really don't think I will ever get over it. I will see my big red boy again I hope.

I will be planting a new garden on top of him this summer with a weeping birch tree. there is a story there, of course.